The Hangover 2

I put a lot of thought into my blog titles. I like for them to be clever. Unfortunately I can't think of anything witty for this post. Therefore, it's simply titled "The Hangover 2."

My wife and I have just returned to our apartment after seeing the second addition to this franchise. I'm in limbo. I can't decide if this sequel was funnier than the first. It is more outrageous for sure. Zack Galifianakis is possibly the funniest man alive. He outdid himself and "The Hangover part 2" is worth seeing for that fact alone.

Ken Jeong gets a little more screen time in this movie. The guy is hilarious. If they do a third one I would like for him to be throughout the whole movie. I think they should do one more movie. Complete these movies as a trilogy. What would be more than icing on the cake than if Alan got married? He would then be the alpha dog of his wolf pack. Anyway, I was talking about Ken Jeong. He and the monkey are really the only competitors for funniest person in the movie that Galifianakis had. Don't get me wrong Bradley Cooper and Ed Helms dish out the laughter, but Zack, Ken, and the cigarette smoking monkey own this film.

You can expect this movie to basically follow the same story line as the first movie. If you're going to see the writers do something new with this movie you're going to be disappointed. However, if you're going to laugh your ass off you will get a belly full. This movie and its predecessor are the only movies that kept me laughing from beginning to end in a long time. Probably because, other than "Dumb and Dumber," they're about as close to my sense of humor as a movie can get.

If you don't like your humor, rude, crude, and uncalled for then you should skip this all together.

Overall I give "The Hangover part 2" an A- on the verge of a B+. Full of laughs but nothing we haven't already seen.

Okay, side bar. I'm an avid viewer of movie trailers. If there's a movie I'm really excited about I'll view the trailer dozens of times. I can't even tell you how many times I watched the trailer for "The Dark Knight." When trailers for "The Dark Knight Rises" finally arrive you can bet I'll watch every trailer about a hundred times. I've been following all the news for the newest Batman since I saw "The Dark Knight."

Tonight before Hangover was a trailer for a remake of "Fright Night." Honestly, it looks like it has a lot of potential. Granted I've never seen the first. Now, this trailer could be deceptive, and the movie be a stink fest. I hope not because it looks cool. I've added the original to my Netflix. If I'm going to see a remake I need to be able to judge it against the original. I've included the trailer for the new "Fright Night" below. Am I right or wrong? Full of potential or full of sh. . .

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By The Power of Thor You've Been Thunderstruck

It's one of my favorite times of the year: Summer movie season. All the big blockbusters that I spend one to two years waiting for are finally getting released. I'm more of a fan of the big budget summer movies than I am the low budget independent movies. Don't get me wrong. There are some great independent releases. Moon - a 2009 independent Science Fiction movie - is one of my favorite Sci-Fi movies I've seen. A movie like 127 Hours, on the other hand, I slept through over half of.

Last year I chronicled about six months worth of movie going. I got lazy the second half of the year, and didn't continue my movie journey with you guys. I've caught a lot of flack for that. I apologize. I didn't realize I had such faithful readers. That's what comments are for, people. I'm self indulgent and enjoy attention. If you like a blog. Let me know. Anyway, on to the review.

I'm a huge fan of comic books. Have been since I could look at pictures. One day when I become a successful writer I would like to segway into the writing of comics. Currently I'm reading Preacher by Garth Ennis. It's one of the most exciting, and most disturbing, comics I've read. I want my uncle to snag this part if it ever makes it to film. Check out his IMDB page, James Jarrett. Once you've done that check out his movie Dance of the Dead. Uncle James stars as Gravedigger. One day he'll be remembered as a legend among zombie slayers.

This weekend, for Mother's Day, I took my mom to see Thor. The year 2008 was a revolutionary year for comic movies. The Dark Knight changed the way that people looked at movies based upon comics. It changed the way these movies could be made. Comic movies, like comic books, can be serious and adult oriented. Read Watchmen, The Killing Joke, and The Dark Knight Returns. Those, my friends, are not your run of the mill comics. They're game changers. Alan Moore is my favorite comic writer. He's the Herman Melville of the comic industry. He's crazy but will blow your mind. The last two years or so have been weak years for comic based movies. It's sad to say. However, I think Thor is the best comic movie since The Dark Knight.

Let me get to Thor. This movie was awesome. It starts off with a bang. The movie doesn't slow down for about a half hour. You're taken down this crazy winding row about the feud the Norse Gods have with the Frost Giants. I love Norse Mythology. I have about three books on my Kindle about Norse Mythology that I'm about to wet my pants to read. I just haven't gotten around to it yet. Norse mythology is also a reason I'm a fanboy of The Wheel of Time. Robert Jordan weaves so much of the mythology into the series you can have a field day hunting the myths out.

Chris Hemsworth played the ideal Thor. I loved the guy. I think Hemsworth looked even better than the comic. I've never been a reader of Thor, but this movie made me a fan. I've also never been a fan of how Thor looked on page. I was skeptical of this movie because of that. Chris Hemsworth made me believe the Norse God of Thunder might actually exist, and if he did, he would be none different than he was portrayed on screen.

Tom Hiddleson approached the part of Loki in an interesting way. He based his character on Shakespeare's Henry V. It's been years since I've read play but I thought it was very fitting for the character. Hiddleson's performance should give the viewers a balanced mixture of sympathy and dislike for Loki.

The rest of the cast were all nice additions. Natalie Portman, of course, holds her own with Hemsworth and Hiddleson. I've never been disappointed with any movie Ms. Portman has acted in. She had me at The Professional. Another member of the secondary cast who did not disappoint was Anthony Hopkins. He was stellar as Odin the All Father.

One aspect of this movie that I loved was the humor. There were a number of scenes where I laughed out loud. I think this is going to make the movie very assessable to the casual viewer. One scene in particular is where Thor is hitting at a hole in the wall restaurant. He's had his first cup of coffee ever. In appreciation of this fine cup of Joe he slams the mug upon the floor and shouts, "I'll have another!" I believe every single person in theater laughed. It's much funnier than my small snippet.

My only complaint about the movie is that the Frost Giants looked like the demons from the television show Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Each time those guys were on screen I expected Sara Michelle Gellar to ram a stake through their chests. Thank God she never did.

Thor is a nice christening for the 2011 movie season.

Grade: A+

I'm looking forward to the rest of the movie season. Here are other movies I'll be checking out:

THE HANGOVER PART II

X-MEN: FIRST CLASS

SUPER 8

GREEN LANTERN

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS, PART 2

CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER

COWBOYS AND ALIENS

CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE

RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES*

30 MINUTES OR LESS

CONAN THE BARBARIAN

*I'm a devotee of the original Planet of the Apes. If this turns out to be a horrendous adaption like Tim Burton's piece of trash I'll never see another having to do with apes taking over the world.

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Five Television Shows That Won't Waster Your Time

It's not always easy to find a good t.v. show to follow. Especially if you're busy. I work, write, read, and set aside a fair amount of time for my wife. There are literally zero shows that I DVR. With the premiere of Game of Thrones a little over 24 hours away that's all about to change. In honor of Mr. Martin's Ice and Fire series finally hitting the small screen. I decided to blog about my five favorite television shows. GoT's premiere is only one of the motivating factors for this blog. I'll talk about other motivations throughout this countdown.

In the words of the Clown Prince of Crime . . .

And . . . Here . . . We . . . Go . . .

5. Dexter

One of only two shows that aren't science fiction or fantasy on my list. Dexter helps to round out the bottom two. Honestly, this was a difficult decision. But Dex stabbed his way into the top five.

There's great writing. Great acting. Great guest stars. A major plot twist in the fourth season. Dexter is everyone's favorite sociopathic serial killer. Some of my favorite parts of the show are the conversations he has with his dead father. I have to say James Remar is stunning as Dexter's dad. Not to mention he's one of my favorite actors I forget about.

I firmly believe that there are things that a writer can learn from television. Dexter is a anti-hero done right. Check it out, people. You won't be disappointed.

Warning: There's a fair amount of sex, language, and violence. Stray away if you care not for such things.

4. 24

No television show has ever kept me as stressed out as 24. From the get-go there are more twist and turns going on than you can imagine. Thank God Jack Bauer is will be there to save America. He is our only hope. I don't believe Kiefer Sutherlin was ever better. He will be immortalized by this show. Unfortunately I think the rest of the cast was overshadowed. Carlos Bernard, Mary Lynn Rajskub, Dennis Haysburt, and every other face that helps Jack Bauer bring down the enemies all deliver knock out performances. The writing can be like a punch to the gut. Bad things happen and sometimes one right after the other. It's worth your time.

My only qualm: Every season CTU: LA has a double agent. C'mon, people, do you not do better background or security checks?

3. Lost

No one will ever know just what the hell the Island was. Not even the creators, the writers, the producers, the directors, so on and so forth. The mystery was one of the things that made the show so awesome. Characters you love at the beginning you'll hate on down the road. Characters you hated from the beginning you'll love after a while. You'll never forget the numbers 4 8 15 16 23 42. You won't forget the lyric, "You all everybody." You'll sing it when you don't realize it. Hurly will be your favorite character and you'll sympathize for each and every individual stranded by Oceanic Flight 815.

Be Warned: The end will piss you off.

2. Battlestar Galatica

The best thing the Scifi network ever televised. Now that they're the SyFy network I avoid them like the plague. Talk about going down the crapper, guys. This is hard science-fiction done splendidly (Some people may argue this point, but oh well. My blog not yours). Personally I avoid hard scifi at times because I'm afraid it will be so over my head that I won't be able to enjoy. I'm sitting here trying to think of words to type, but am at a loss. There are so many great things to say about this show. I mean this is the reason it's my number 2. Forgive me for not having more suitable words, but this show was brilliant from beginning to end. You'll replace the word f*ck with the word frakk, and enjoy saying it just as much. Edward James Olmos will make you want to become one of his officers. The man's presence is commanding, and you just respect him. Starbuck kicks ass from beginning to end.

Enough of the purple prose.

Just. Go. Watch.

1. Firefly

I don't even hesitate to say that this is the best show I've ever watched. Nathan Fillion's Malcolm Reynolds must be Han Solo's bastard child. Firefly had it all. It was a western set in space which is brilliant genre blending. The show was action packed, had enough of the technicalities to attract hard scifi fans, was just enough space opera to please the casual viewer, beautiful acting, will leave you in stitches you're laughing so hard, and after you finish watching the 14 episodes plus the movie Serenity you'll love every minute and wish you could relive them all. I shake my fist at Fox Broadcasting Company for screwing Joss Whedon  and Firefly over. I guess I'll just after to re-watch over and over thinking about what could have been. I'll forever consider myself a Brown Coat so it's easy to list Firefly as my favorite show that will not waster your time.



Wait . . . Wait . . . the blog's not over yet. Here're a few Honorable Mentions . . .



Honorable Mention #1 . . . .

The Shield

Vic Mackey is the best bad cop ever.

Honorable Mention #2 . . .

True Blood

Thankfully these vampires don't sparkle.

You will also mutter Sookie in anger.

Well, there ya go. If you were struggling to find a good t.v. show that wouldn't waster your time I hoped this helped. Now, I'm off to try and decide what to watch next. Here's what's up next on my To-Watch list if you'd like to lend a hand in helping me choose: Farscape, The X-Files, Sons of Anarchy, and Dr. Who.

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Words for Writers: With a Little Help From My Friends

Firstly, it's nice having people that read and comment the blog. Thank you to all that do. I apologize I'm not more consistent. I don't like to post unless I feel like I have something to say that has substance, and I'm lazy.

Now to the post . . .

One of the most common things you'll hear said about the art of writing is that it's a solitary act. You'll spend hours, days, nights, weeks, months, and years by yourself. You'll spend that time alone dreaming, imagining, creating, and crafting stories. The craft requires that. As a writer you need that time alone.

What does not need to happen is that you drift from the main land, and become an island unto yourself.

I've been thinking about that for the past few days and weeks. I have a tendency to be a loner. I've been so since I was a kid. Personally, I'd prefer to spend time to myself. It has nothing to do with people, but I know how to entertain myself better than anyone I know. (Except for my wife. She knows me pretty well.)

What I've pondered more than anything else is this: What kind of people do writers need in their lives? I think there are a number of different types of people we need, but I think I've narrowed it down to the three most important.

Here we go:

1. A spouse or partner who believes in your art.

Ursula Le Guin was once quoted:

If you want your writing to be taken seriously, don't marry and have kids, and above all, don't die. But if you have to die, commit suicide. They approve of that.

Why would the Mother of Fantasy say not to marry or have kids? I believe she said so because when you do either of these two things you're giving your life and time up for another. I've been married for two years. I devote many hours to my wife. There are times when I would like to be writing that I spend with her instead. With jobs and school we don't get to see one another much. Therefore, I'll spend whatever time I can with her.

However, my wife believes in my dream of becoming a published author as much - sometimes more - than I do. It's an encouraging thing. We don't have the same tastes in literature but I know that I can sit and tell her my story ideas, and she's genuinely interested. She's also objective and offers great advice. If she didn't believe in my dream so much this journey would be much more discouraging than it can already be. Being married to a woman who would rather me give up my imaginary worlds to become a pencil pusher is a horrifying thought. A guy I work with tells me daily to go to college, get a business degree, and make the dollar bills. I don't need that at home. I need someone who will help me incubate my dreams.

2. Friends who will be there throughout the journey.

I wish I had more friends interested in my stories. I wish I had more people I could talk to about the art of writing, my favorite books, and my favorite authors. Most of the people I know are more interested in finding a job where they can earn a big paycheck to pay their bills. That's understandable. I'm someone who needs to talk about my stories. I need to tell someone about my new ideas, and the new things I've written. I can't be like Stephen King and keep what I'm working on a secret. I need someone to listen. I need friends who will be just as excited as I am about my stories.

Thankfully I'm not alone. I can always count on Derik Hefner to lend me an ear. We don't talk as much as I would like us to, but our emails and other forms of conversation are always fruitful. Recently we exchanged a series of emails about the latest story I've been working on. I was having some trouble working through an idea. I submitted this to Derik and received an email with his ideas of how to solve my problem. I thought about it for a day and a half and then replied. His response has stuck with me for weeks now. It was a short sentence. Only four words. But he did so much for me. He said, "OMG that is so awesome!!!" Every writer - no matter who they are - needs that kind of encouragement.

3. Every writer needs authors, they can read, who gets their creative juices flowing.

Every writer's taste is different. That doesn't really matter. What does matter is that they can run to these authors they love, crack open their novels, and read. While reading ideas spring to life. Moments of zing spring forth from their imaginations, and new stories arise. Characters are and birthed out of these moments of enjoyment. Presently I'm reading George R.R. Martin's series, "A Song of Ice and Fire." I've never had such an enjoyable reading experience since I read Robert Jordan's "The Wheel of Time."

Whenever I get frustrated, and my writing starts to suffer, I pick up books by my favorite authors and spend a few moments with them. I always leave better and encouraged. Whoever sets you on fire for the art is who you need to run to when your wood is wet.

Finally, I'd like to share a song with you. It's what inspired this blog. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Without further ado . . . Joe Cocker performing "With a Little Help From My Friends" at Woodstock '69.

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Words for Writers: The Recipe for Being a Great Writer

I'm not a self-motivated person. If I were my blog would stay updated much more consistently than it does. I figure if I'm posting once a week that's a quite an achievement. If I post twice a week I'm over achieving. I don't consider myself lazy. I'm just a little more easy going than others.

When I decided becoming a published author was the goal of my life I invested hours of research into finding advice offered by the greats. Most of my researched focused on fantasy writers. I was once told that fantasy writers are good storytellers but not good writers. That is something I whole heartedly disagree with. Yes, there are fantasy writers who excel in their story telling abilities, and whose writing isn't quite up to par. However, the fantasy writers who are great easily stand on equal footing with the giants of the literary genre. To name a few: Ursula K. Le Guin, Michael Moorcock, George R.R. Martin, Robert Jordan (who's greatest fault was he was such a great writer), et cetera. I did my best to find out what these writers had to say about the craft. Without fail each of them said that two things developed a great writer: 1. Read as much as you can. 2. Write as much as you can.

After I gleaned as much as I could from fantasy writers I looked into what writers outside the genre had to say. Unsurprisingly their advice was not much different. 

In my opinion a third point needs to be added. Not only do you need to read as much as you can. Not only must you write as often as you can find the time. It is of the utmost importance that as a writer you be a self-motivated person.

When I first struck down the path of writing and becoming published I didn't realize how necessary it was to be self-motivated. As I stated earlier I am in no fashion self-motivated. A good day for me is laying around on the couch, watching a little television, and reading about fifty to a hundred pages of whatever book I'm currently involved. After about a year I still struggle with doing more with my days than laying around taking it easy. 

Most people would probably say that I really don't love writing enough. Maybe there's a sliver of truth to that. Writing is about the only thing I think about. (Granted loving thoughts of my wife also take up a good portion of my thinking faculties.)

Every writer needs drive. Without that your days will be spent thinking instead of doing. My wife is at school until sometime around 2 o'clock today. Saturdays are a good day for me to write . . . when I have the motivation. To shake up my routine I removed myself from the easy going environment that is our apartment. Instead I'm sitting here at Barnes and Noble about to open a file and put flesh to a few ideas I've been incubating. I feel like I've doused my flames with fresh kerosene, and can get a few good words on page. Hopefully I've done the same for you.

Have a good weekend, friends.

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Words for Writers: Read. Your Craft Depends On It.

I read books for the same reason I eat the still-beating hearts of my enemies: to gain their power. -Dan Wells

I love that quote. For writers there's so much truth in it. I've learned more about the craft of writing by doing, and reading, than I have by reading instruction manuals. There are some really good books on the craft of writing out there. One, Stephen King's "On Writing" (before reading the book you must realize that King is a pompous ass, and comes off as if his method is gospel.). For fantasy writers Orson Scott Card's "How To Write Science Fiction and Fantasy" is quite dandy.

As good as both of those books are I've discovered more about myself, and putting words to the page, by spending hours with my nose in book after book. About two weeks ago I started reading "A Game of Thrones" by George R.R. Martin. I had put off reading this book for a while. There is so much hype around it. You could surf message boards for hours, and the posters exalt this series as the greatest fantasy series ever written. I let "A Game of Thrones" gather dust on my bookcase for close to a year before I picked it up.

Months ago I came across news that HBO was adapting Marin's series into for the small screen. This piked my interest but I resisted opening the cover, and digging into the story. A few weeks ago I caught the first trailer, and was blown away. I think HBO may have adapted the most beautiful fantasy series since Peter Jackson worked on "The Lord of the Rings." Still I left the book alone. About two weeks ago I caught an 11 minute clip of behind the scenes footage for the series. They interviewed different characters, and Marin himself. I could resist any longer, and read the story.

I was immersed.

First, I've never read such real people before. I can't think of many writers who can compare to George Martin's characterization skills, particularly his Daenerys story line. Her evolution as a character was beautiful to read. It was like watching a caterpillar become a butterfly.

The overall series, "A Song of Ice and Fire," is big. Mr. Martin planned seven books. His plotting is brilliant. I've gleaned nugget after nugget reading "Thrones." The unique thing about fantasy is that you can get away with writing big sprawling epics. That's why a lot of readers love the genre. The problem is a lot of fantasy writers aren't very good at plotting, or foreshadowing. Sitting here thinking about "A Game of Thrones" I recall small things that George Martin did at the beginning of the book that didn't come to fruition until six hundred pages later. His hinting, and nudging, and game of smoke and mirrors was comparable to the Mona Lisa. His writing, plotting, foreshadowing was artwork. It should be admired.

I could go on and on. I've never read someone who could juggle so many point of views in one book. Just off hand I think Martin had about 7 to 8 characters who's point of view you read from. The only other writer who could match that is Robert Jordan, but even in "The Wheel of Time" you don't get into many multiple POV's until books later.

George Martin's prose was quick, easy, and brisk. The problem with so many fantasy writers is that their sentences are so long, and meandering, that I quite reading. It's distracting and can be very frustrating. Mr. Martin packed some heavy punch in small sentences, and catapulted me from word to word with this method. I loved it.

I've got thirty pages left of "A Game of Thrones." As soon as I close the book I'm going to take its sequel, "A Clash of Kings," from my bookcase and devour it. I kind of feel like I've been endowed with some special power after reading George R.R. Martin's writing. It has been an exhilarating experience. If you want to learn about the art of writing great fantasy pick up "A Song of Ice and Fire" by George R.R. Martin. I've learned more in these 800 pages than I have reading Tolkien, Lewis, and anyone else you stand next to Mr. Martin.

Read, writers.

There's power to be gained by the page!

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Words for Writers: Dialog Exercises

I enjoy a podcast called Writing Excuses. Week to week Brandon Sanderson, Howard Tayler, and Dan Wells offer valuable tips on the craft of writing. Each writer is proven and has seen success with each of their work. Brandon Sanderson is a New York Times best selling fantasy writer. After Robert Jordan passed away Jordan's widow Harriet asked Mr. Sanderson to complete "The Wheel of Time" series. Dan Wells is the author of the YA horror series about sociopath John Clever. I've read the first installment of the trilogy "I Am Not A Serial Killer." Very well written with an unexpected twist. Lastly, Howard Tayler writes one of the most successful webcomics "Schlock Mercenary." Tayler also holds the honor of Schlock being the longest running webcomic. Schlock Mercenary has been running for more than a decade.

Recently the Writing Excuses team commission listeners to do dialog exercises. Since the focus was dialog only there were a few rules: No tags and no narration. Since those two things were taken away the dialog had to communicate: distinctive characters, setting, and conflict. After readers sent in their submissions Brandon, Howard, and Dan critiqued the entries over the 'cast. I didn't actually do the exercise until five minutes ago. Since I haven't submitted my dialog to the Writing Excuse guys I'd figure I'd post it here for fun.

If you'd like to offer your thoughts about my work feel free.

If you're a writer I encourage you to do these kinds of things to sharpen your skills.

If you'd like to check out the podcast you can listen to first episode HERE and the second episode HERE. Don't worry about a lot of you're time being taken. The episodes are twenty minutes are less. 

Without further ado my story through dialog is below . . .

***

It's gone.

What? What d'ya mean it's gone?

I mean, it's not here.

Where'd it go?

I don't know. We wasn't here.

I know we wasn't here, but wasn't anybody else either.

As far as we know.

Don't say that.

Why?

Just don't.

But we weren't. Hey, what are you doing? Don't do that.

It's gotta be here somewhere.

Well, put that down. That staff is 3000 years old.

I gotta find it.

The emerald is gone, but don't cause more problems.

Master Jonana is going to be furious.

Yeah, but don't make it worse. Put the staff down.

Oh my Gods!

I told you to put the staff down.

I, uh, I didn't think. The magic only works for the pure bloods.

Look we gotta get.

We can't.

And be beheaded?

Gods! Gods!

Let's go. Now!

We can't. No.

The emerald's gone. You just put a gaping hole in Jonana's study. Let's get.

This is all your fault.

Mine! How d'ya mean?

This would'a never happen if you hadn't of put those ideas in my head.

Ideas? What ideas?

I'm leaving. Going.

That's what I've been saying. Let's go.

No, not with you.

Hey, whatever. Let's get.

You're not going either.

What? Hey! Hey! Put that staff away. Look what you already did.

Anxis, I'm sorry.

Dorie, no!

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